Road rage.
Anyone else have a weird relationship with road rage?
I do. I both fear it and love it.
I fear the screaming stranger behind the wheel of a vehicle that could crush mine. Simultaneously, I love wielding the opportunity to be petty with my speed and driving maneuvers.
One thing that really pushes my buttons is when a car behind me takes the time to change lanes and go around me just to be one car ahead—traffic isn’t clear in front of us; there’s no where else to go!
My subtle road rage comes out when I change lanes and hope to God that I’ll be able to catch a light before them. I picture them eating my dust as I cruise on by, my hair billowing out the window without a care in the world.
Meanwhile, they’ve likely forgotten they ever cut in front of me in the first place by now.
If you really think about it, people communicating with two-ton machinery at high speeds is also petrifying. Honking, cutting off, flashing the birdie, slamming on your breaks, following—all these intimidation tactics make my heart race and I find myself in an emergency response pickle:
I want to freeze (which is my main trauma response), but I’m driving a vehicle so it’s not totally in the cards to clam up completely. I still have to drive.
Nevertheless, my subtle expression of road rage will blast through the interior of my vehicle on occasion. It possess me like an angry ghost that haunts my Honda only when I'm in a hurry.
When I'm in no rush to get to my destination and someone behind me is creeping on my butt it's: "Whoa, man. Calm down. Are you serious right now? Where's the fire?"
When I am that person passive aggressively communicating with my bumper that the driver ahead is moving at a glacial speed, it's: "DRIVE FASTER DEAR GOD." I try to keep in mind that I’ve also been that person on a Sunday afternoon fancying a gentle drive around town to decompress.
Simultaneously, I also try to keep in mind that many a time I have been that speeding driver when I woke up too late to get to work on time.
I’ve been both the road rage perpetrator and victim in some form or fashion. I think it’ll be a good sign of growth when I can empathize with both in those moments behind the wheel.